Do you know what is quite funny?

Let's start with this one, a New Zealand joke about its neighbor.

Why do seagulls fly over Australia upside down?

Because there's nothing worth shitting on.

Yep. Such is the love between members of the dominion. While Australians might dislike Kiwis, they both despise South Africans -- and like reminding them of apartheid. And the Irish seem just a bit sore about that whole "carving the country in two and denying a unified nation" thing that the British did. But they can all agree on one thing: never start a conversation with a Scotsman. They have nothing to say, and you wouldn't understand it if they did.

I suppose what truly unites all these nations (besides colonialism and massacres) is an appreciation and admiration for comedy. British comedy has a special standing in the world, simultaneously known for quick wit, deadpan delivery, clever turns of phrase, irony, understatement and, well, Benny Hill.

Ed Byrne represents the self-deprecating, socially aware comedians that have conquered the comedic world in the past decade. I saw his new live show, Different Classes, at Riverside Studios in Hammersmith. He's a clever Irish comic, with quirky anecdotes and clever insights. Check out this video of him teaching Alanis Morrisette a lesson on irony.

But he is Irish. And he was drinking a beer on stage.

And just for kicks, we'll end with this riff on the Irish.

An American lawyer asked, "Paddy, why is it that whenever you ask an Irishman a question, he answers with another question?"

"Who told you that?" asked Paddy.

The end of civilization -- coming to a nation near you

During his umpteenth interview with newspapers/ magazines for that ever-compelling story of "Who is Mike Huckabee?" -- the former Arkansas governor was asked about same-sex marriage by GQ.

His response:

There’s never been a civilization that has rewritten what marriage and family
means and survived.

He's right. Remember when, in the 19th century, women suddenly wanted to marry someone they loved instead of being sold off by their family, usually to an older gentleman? Society crashed.

Or that time when people finally stood aside and allowed interracial marriages? Whew. The armageddon that ensued after that one.

Eviction notice

In a story light on the justice and heavy on waxing poetic about days gone-by, The New York Times writes that the Boy Scout group in Philadelphia will have to vacate its downtown building in June after the group and the city council failed to reconcile over non-discrimination language.

Basically, the city cannot and will not lease property to a group that knowingly discriminates against homosexuals, no matter how much the group resonates with the Good Ol' Boys at the Times.

Just read the lede on the story:

PHILADELPHIA, Dec. 4 — For three years the Philadelphia council of the Boy Scouts of America held its ground. It resisted the city’s request to change its discriminatory policy toward gay people despite threats that if it did not do so, the city would evict the group from a municipal building where the Scouts have resided practically rent free since 1928.

But Condi ..

As if the State Department needed more bad publicity (Iran ... Iraq ... the "gaudy, empty show" that was the Annapolis Peace Conference), now a former ambassador to Romania, Michael Guest, has resigned in protest over the agency's unequal treatment of same-sex partners.

From the WaPo:

For instance, same-sex partners -- or unmarried heterosexual partners -- are refused anti-terrorism security training or foreign-language training and are not evacuated when eligible family members are ordered to depart. Unlike spouses, they do not receive diplomatic passports, visas or even use of the State Department mail system. They also must pay their own way overseas, get their own medical care and are left to fend for themselves if a partner is sent to a dangerous post such as Iraq

Guest reportedly talked about the unfair treatment during his goodbye ceremony, a few steps from Condi's office.

Taking responsibility for ourselves

At a rally in Washington Friday, speaker after speaker after speaker rose to the lectern and lambasted the president and his administration for what they saw as a fundamental failure in dealing with the global AIDS crisis.

Of course, in Washington, the fears and the anger and the sense of abandonment becomes exponentially worse because in this city, the capital, the seat of our democracy, HIV-infection rates are higher than any other city in the U.S. Here, 1 in 20 residents has HIV.

Yes, the President's Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief thwarts effective efforts by requiring that 33 percent of the funds sent abroad to fight AIDS be used for abstinence only education programs.

But, sometimes, we have to take responsibility for our own actions. In two new reports, it seems that HIV-positive men who know their HIV status continue to have unprotected sex. And although some of the partnerings are between two HIV-positive men, it's still a grim and dissapointing look at how -- as much as we clamor for more help in fighting the disease -- the gay community continues to engage in dangerous practices.

It's been 25 years since the public truly became aware of the epidemic. 25 years.

Why do we continue to infect each other? Why do we continue to engage in such risky activity?

Why can't we do as much for ourselves as we demand from others?

The hardest working man in the closet

Okay, so the gay prostitute who outed Ted Haggard has now told the Idaho Statesman that he also had sex with Larry Craig.

Yes, he does a book coming out detailing his sordid affair with the former preacher (and "reformed" former homosexual) and he does come across as sort of a shameless publicity hound, but come on, it's too good not to to believe.

In essence -- at least according to old school health video logic -- Haggard and Craig have had sex.

Haggard and Craig. Gross.

Kerr-age

At the Republican debacle, er, um, debate the other night, a retired gay general, Keith Kerr, stood up to press the candidates about the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy. And the candidates flubbed, especially Mitt Romney, who told a general with 43 years of experience that gays and lesbians would be bad for the military.

Did you learn that during your time in the military? Right, right. You weren't in the armed services.

And the controversy that followed? That Kerr is affiliated with Sen. Hillary Clinton's camp.

It seems mostly everyone has rolled over the actual exchange between Kerr and the candidates because, you know, the president of the United States doesn't have to answer to anyone who differs from him ideologically.